I Need Some Sunshine

Written by Aaron Helman

My 13-year-old hasn’t seen the sun in a week

I’ve been swimming in data and statistics about teenage stress and busyness; numbers around hours spent doing homework and hours spent practicing instruments.

So I know, logically, that teenagers today are busier than they’ve ever been before. In fact, many of them have longer work days than their parents.

So, yes, I already knew all of that in my head.

But last week it finally hit my heart.

Seasonal depression and me

I’ve been aware for a few years that I struggle with seasonal depression. It’s winter in Indiana which means that I’m severely lacking for exposure to sunlight, fresh air, and outdoor exercise. That has a dramatic affect on my brain, my mood, and my demeanor.

I was sitting in front of my happy-light (technically called a therapy lamp), and my son came and plopped down next to me. He’d been despondent lately, a fact that I chalked up to the fact that he’s thirteen-years-old. But even then, it had been worse than usual.

He spoke first:

“Do you mind if I start using this too?”

“Yeah, why?”

“I think I might have what you have.”

A few moments passed, then he said:

“I haven’t seen the sun in a week.”

On its face, this wasn’t such a strange statement for Northern Indiana. The perma-cloud shows up mid-October and virtually every day is gray until April.

But as I thought about what he said and realized what he meant, it was much bigger than that.

Every day, I drop him off at school before the sun comes up.

And every day, I pick him up from basketball practice after the sun goes down.

I am not exaggerating when I say that, as an adult who’s no longer dealing with teenage hormones, those are circumstances that could literally threaten my sanity.

And my heart broke.

For him and for all of the other students that I know that are like him.

The truth is that there are students in my ministry who are dealing with the kinds of stress and pressure that would absolutely cause me – a grown man – to crack; and instead of being concerned about them, I’ve been concerned about their attendance.

Sometimes you have to really look a teenager – and really listen – to understand their lives, but when you do, it changes the way you see things, and that changes the way you have to do ministry.

Liked this blog post? Then you’ll also enjoy this one – Do You Really Need Another Christmas Event?

Aaron Helman is on a mission to end youth worker burnout by providing the training and resources that you haven’t been taught… until now. Smarter Youth Ministry exists to help you learn how to manage their time and resources better so that you can do more ministry with less frustration. All of that having been said, you most likely know him as the creator of “Lamentation or Taylor Swift Lyric.”